I’m beyond pissed. I’m furious. Fr. Mike ever so kindly granted our request to be the officiating priest at our garden wedding ceremony (read: not in a church). Thus, our plans went underway working under the assumption that we can have our Catholic wedding at this beautiful garden setting surrounded by a man-made lake. Then comes my conversation with the priest of the parish where our garden is located and he goes “We do not allow holding any garden weddings. Not in my Parish. Not anywhere in the Philippines.” “I will not allow it at my Parish. The Archbishop will not allow it” The fact the he said such in a forceful and superior tone didn’t help matters. First off, this is not a tirade against God, neither is this against the Vatican. This is solely against the Catholic Church in the Philippines. Incredibly, Catholic weddings in the Philippines, and only in the Philippines, are prohibited from being celebrated in any other place but the church. I don’t understand why. If Catholics in other countries can marry outside of the church, why can’t we do the same here in the Philippines? Is there now such as thing as “Filipino Catholic”? Last time I checked, we were Roman Catholics. I cannot understand the wisdom behind such prohibition? WHY? WHY? WHY? If masses can be held at malls, on the streets and every where else, why can’t a wedding ceremony be held at a very serene and peaceful environment surrounded by the natural wonders of God? Isn’t it that God’s presence can be felt anywhere? Why are we forced to hold a wedding ceremony at a church wherein the moment we step out the doors, we are immediately bombarded by the noise of the bayan, the radios and the roaring jeepneys and tricycles? There is simply no reason for such prohibition. Even more, this prohibition has nothing to do with God. Even if I would allow the church to dictate the venue of my ceremony, chances are, the Church will be fully booked already and will be unable to accommodate us. We chose a particular date for various reasons special to us as a couple. I refuse to allow the Church to dictate WHEN I should be getting married. I’m a lawyer I know that rules are essential for an orderly and civilized society. However, there must be a reason for such rules. These can not be whimsically, arbitrarily capriciously and despotically imposed upon the people. I refuse to surrender to the unreasonable whims of the Filipino Catholic Church. This is not to say that I’m denouncing my Catholicism. I’ve been brought up as a Catholic and has imbibed most of its teachings. However, I know when to stop and refuse from being a puppet.

I’m beyond pissed. I’m furious. Fr. Mike ever so kindly granted our request to be the officiating priest at our garden wedding ceremony (read: not in a church). Thus, our plans went underway working under the assumption that we can have our Catholic wedding at this beautiful garden setting surrounded by a man-made lake. Then comes my conversation with the priest of the parish of where our garden is located and he goes “We do not allow holding any garden weddings. Not in my Parish. Not anywhere in the Philippines.” “I will not allow it at my Parish. The Archbishop will not allow it” The fact the he said such in a forceful and superior tone didn’t help matters. First off, this is not against God, neither is this against the Vatican. This is solely against the Catholic Church in the Philippines. Incredibly, Catholic weddings in the Philippines, and only in the Philippines, are prohibited from being celebrated anywhere else but the church. I don’t understand why. If Catholics in other countries can marry outside of the church, why can’t we do it in here in the Philippines? Is there now such as thing as “Filipino Catholic”? Last I checked, we were Roman Catholics. I cannot understand the wisdom behind such prohibition? WHY? WHY? WHY? If masses are held at malls, on the streets and every where else, why can’t a wedding ceremony be held at a very serene and peaceful environment surrounded by the natural wonders of God? Isn’t it that God’s presence can be felt anywhere? Why are we forced to hold a wedding ceremony at a church wherein the moment we step out the doors, we are immediately bombarded by the noise of the bayan, the radios and the roaring jeepneys and tricycles? There is simply no reason for such prohibition. Even more, this prohibition has nothing to do with God. Even if I would allow the church to dictate the venue of my ceremony, chances are, the Church will be fully booked already and will be unable to accommodate us. We chose a particular date for various reasons special to us as a couple. I refuse to allow the Church to dictate WHEN I should be getting married. I refuse to surrender to the unreasonable whims of the Filipino Catholic Church. I’m a lawyer I know that rules are essential for an orderly and civilized society. However, there must be a reason for such rules. These can not be whimsically, arbitrarily capriciously and despotically imposed upon the people. This is not to say that I’m denouncing my Catholicism. I’ve been brought up as a Catholic and has imbibed most of its teachings. However, I know when to stop and refuse from being a puppet.

Lesson No. 1

Choosing the perfect wedding date depends on various factors. It may be meaningful to the couple, or dictated by feng shui, or simply looks good (i.e. July 7, 2007) or for whatever reason depending on the whims of the couple. The past week has taught me that no matter how long and how deep you’ve searched your soul for the alleged perfect date, chances are, you will not get it. No matter how steadfast your resolve to marry on a particular date is, all these will dissolve on day you look for a venue. The only way you can secure your choice wedding date is if you book your venue at least four years before you marry. THIS IS NOT A JOKE. One of the places we looked at, and fell in love with (it’s reasonable prices didn’t hurt either!), is fully booked (meaning all Saturdays, Sundays and Fridays) until 2010! The only available date is Black Saturday….. Now, all B and I want is to find a nice venue, that can accommodate our wedding within the range of time that we have settled on. (Our range spans 2 months). Lesson 1: There is only one perfect wedding date, the date when your venue of choice can accommodate your wedding.

My First Step

I got my first wedding magazine yesterday. It was my first semblance of wedding preparations. Incidentally, I didn’t even buy it. A good friend gave it to me, much to my surprise. I knew that one of these days, I would have to look at those over-priced glossy pages bound by glue, but it wasn’t exactly in my immediate things to do. I was more concerned with meeting with the wedding planner and leaving everything up to her (tee-hee) After flipping through the glossy pages, I found myself excited to plan for my wedding! I then resolved to make a wedding file. The wedding file shall be made up of cut outs of things/ideas I find in magazines or wherever and place it in their designated areas in the folder, for future reference and consideration. Nice idea ‘no? As much as I want to take credit for it, I got it all from my friend, G, who’s getting married real soon. Do you know that there’s a thing called “Wedding Workbook”??? It has all the wedding OC-ness. It looks like its way too much for me. I’ll probably use for the first two(2) weeks then forget all about it and its OC details. On the other hand, it also looks useful. I dunno… Maybe I’ll get it. Or ask someone to get it for me. (I saw it at National Bookstore and it sells for P1,500.00).

Round 1

If you all thing I’m walking on Cloud 9 now and happily planning the wedding of my dreams. You’re dead wrong. Au contraire First off, I have no wedding of my dreams. Sure I have a general idea of having a happy, perfect wedding. But I cannot get more specific than that. Which brings me to dilemma number 2. I know nothing about wedding planning. There are a thousand and one details to take care of and I don’t even know a quarter of those! While some people I know has always has a “wedding book”, I don’t even have enough ideas to fill a page, much less make a book. However, since my good friend Mikee got married, I decided that my color scheme would be the lightest yellow (just like the color of a rose when it borders between yellow and peach). I was 100% decided on this. Until a month ago when I decided deep red would be a good color too. I can imagine myself holding a tightly set round bouquet of red roses while my entourage, in their deep red gowns, hold three pieces of while calla lilies. Nice picture don’t you think? But I’ve always been somewhat against bright and dark colors for weddings. Just now I’m thinking maybe an all-white/ecru wedding might be nice. Or champagne. And the men would wear barong (which would set me back even more coz The ONE and I have already decided that the men will wear suits). Thank God for wedding coordinators. We plan to meet with one soon. We already have a name in my mind. I hope she work out okay! So what color should I go for?

Query 001

Would you rather commit the "what if?" mistake or the "I should not have done that" mistake?

Taking the Plunge

Just like a meteor that shoots out of nowhere and slams smack into the face of the earth, I suddenly found myself headed for wedded bliss. I’ve always thought I would marry at the age of 30. Well not really always (unless “always” begins at age 20) Maybe because of the lack of suitable hubbies-to-be back then. Thus, it seemed safe for me to arbitrarily pick the age of 30 so I won’t be panicking anytime soon. Don’t get me wrong though. I had boyfriends back then but somehow getting married never crossed my mind. In fact, hearing the word “marriage” would send me scurrying into my mouse hole. The idea just never appealed to me back then. As time passed on, I found myself more convinced that the age of 30 is the perfect age to settle down (given that I was still in law school then, I still has to build my law practice, get a master’s degree, etc.) Or at the earliest, the age of 28. Fast forward to now. Lo and behold, I’M GETTING MARRIED. So much for my cast in stone declarations of past. I guess this is what they mean by having and knowing that it’s the ONE. When the right person comes along, then it’s the right time. I once declared, not too long ago and to the ONE no less, that a person will never be ready for marriage. You will just have to take the plunge and hope you’ll stay afloat. Well , I’m eating my words now. I think I’m ready. In fact, I’m excited. Incidentally, the big day will be four days short of my 28th birthday...